{Richie Photo Cred}
DREAM: An older lady is preparing to step out a window—we’re on the third floor. There’s a large piece of construction paper blocking the opening. I push through and tear it out of the way.
“There. Now you can go.”
She goes for it. But the goal is not to fall. I’m trying to teach her a technique where you shuffle your feet front to back keeping you in the air on a consistent plane. She jumps out but fails...then falls straight into a pool down below, feet first.
“What a great dive!” I shout out with sarcasm.
Waking up around noon.
Peanut Butter Bagel. Aloe Vera Juice. Zinc.
Stretching...
Cleaning and picking up around the house—consolidating—throwing out.
Organizing files on the computer...
Anthony: “What could you possibly be doing that isn’t blog-related?”
Me: “I’m organizing! I’m cleaning! Just like you clean up your room I have to do this digitally.”
Anthony: “I’m taking a walk.”
Me: “I’ll give you a wok to walk with.”
Anthony: “Look, I’m gonna let you do your thing. I know you’re an archivist. You’re a librarian that doesn’t live in a library.”
Grilled Cheese with Tomato. Salt n Vinegar Chips. Honey Green Tea.
Watching Catfish [2010].
Interestingly enough, meeting with Katie Tuebner at the house right as Show N Tell is being prepared downstairs...we’ve kept in touch off and on throughout the emotional throes in both her and Les’s relationship, and mine and Margot’s. We’re oddly connected because of what happened back in February when Margot had a physical/crush affair with that other guy.
...
Katie: “Why can’t I let go of this?”
Me: “It’s the state of humanity...we’re afraid of change and we hold on...”
...
Katie: “You can tell a lot about a person by their room.”
Me: “And what can you tell about me?”
Katie: “Clutter...organized clutter.”
Me: “That’s how my brain is.”
...
The kids have their place to go...and we provide the haven. Show N Tell fits better here in the home—intimate—cozy—free—like old times.
...
...
The Front Bottoms perform a short stripped down set after just playing a show at The Jewish Mother earlier in the night. They’re a hit.
...
There’s a thrift store in the backyard via Emily Shourds vintage collection.
...
Stef keeps shouting out sarcastic inappropriate comments.
Me: “Stef, you’re so inapprope’!”
...
Darren offers me some of his leftover Pork, Peppers, Onions, and Bean Tacos.
...
Carmen’s spot in the blog.
...
Anthony: “I think we can say Show N Tell was a roaring success.”
...
Having a few beers, one of them rocking a fancy Middle Ages style label with a castle and a unicorn on the front. Dancing to the record player in the dining room—Stef and Jasmine encouraging my gramps ways, making fun at how old I am...
I enjoy the moments of arms wrapped around each other—innocent friendly affection...
The rest of this night becomes a blur, not in memory, but in chain of events...I remember looking to Anthony for approval before the group coerced me into joining them on a Friends School adventure. He thinks it will be good for me instead of holing myself up in my room for the rest of the night. I put on an old black Cursive hoodie I used to wear ages ago and we venture into the cold windy night. A group of six raiding the rope swing—some of them are rope swing virgins. Rusty and I are not.
...
Foreign Cuddly Space Juncture Evading Real Sex Charming Cute Be Alive My Pleasure Soft Subtle But Not What Will People Think Do You Really Want To Know What Will They Conclude Of My Intentions My Drive Celibate?
What amazes me is the reservations and invisible borders that reside in the physical space between two persons. After a little social situating you realize there are none at all. And the other person was thinking the same thing you were thinking. Life without a girlfriend—without an obligation is different, not something I’m used to...I need to be careful...and at the same time carefree, but not care-less.
Sleep just before 6 a.m.
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