Sunday May 5 2013

Savage Beauty. Alexander McQueen.[i]

☼ ○ ▬

Stuck in the backseat of a car with Minnie. It’s understood I’m a friendly spirit to her. A beautiful woman encircles the car with eager sexual intentions to come inside. I watch this woman continue to walk in a seductive manner. I turn to Minnie and ask, “Do you cringe every time she looks at you?” The woman keeps staring. Minnie’s eyes water up and she leans her head into my shoulder. She’s scared. It seems she doesn’t have the power to avoid the woman. In this moment I realize this is something serious and that this beautiful woman is evil and could possibly even be the devil himself.

▬ ○ ☼


Waking up around 11:30 a.m.


Banana. Acai Blueberry Granola Bar. Orange Juice.


All day shift at China Wok.


Falafel Wrap with Hummus and Tomatoes. Goldfish Crackers. Lemon Water. Kinder Chocolate.


I’m dipping myself in a well of bitterness today. Aysena is acting judgmental and being short with me through messages. I posted last year’s blog entry. In it I was incredibly sad about conclusions with a past lover. Now I’m being told, “you don't have anything like strength inside man,” which she means I don’t have strength like a real man. The criticism is getting old and unbecoming. I have to keep defending my actions and feelings from LAST YEAR. Why does she care so much about it? I really don’t get it. Either way I’m left rambling on in and out of my deliveries but she’s being plain rude and without empathy. I don’t understand her.


Peach Greek Yogurt.


My heart is still with her but it’s a battle inside. Sometimes I just want to forget about my connection with this Yakutian princess across the ocean. But then other times I think it would be a mistake to let it go. I could be missing out on a desirable fairytale of love. But the obstacles are too many, the distance between each other too much. Globalization fails in this matter. 


Sloooooooooow. It’s terribly slow for business tonight for whatever reason.


Becca has been in town over the weekend. I don’t know how it happened but we get carried away in a fake text conversation impersonating a typical married couple with kids.

Husband: “Ah okay. Well ill be at home hopefully around 1030.”

Wife: “Ok I’ll have a bath drawn for you.”

Husband: “And dinner prepared yes? Thanks honey.”

Wife: “It will be ready when you get out from your bath. It’s in the crock pot now.”

Husband: “OoOo. You know how I looove your crock pot meals.”

Wife: “That’s why I made it. Don’t forget to pick up the dry cleaning.”

Husband: “Don’t forget to pick up the kids!”

Wife: “No, Marjorie is getting them, she is taking them to Ed and Sandy’s for the night. Remember this is the Busch Gardens week for the kids.”

Husband: “Oooooh. So that means its just you and me in our big ole house. Good thing we designed the bathtub big enough for the two of us.”

Wife: “You’ll have to get a fire going and we can eat by candlelight. I took the trash out for you, so we can just enjoy ourselves.”


Profits were a total dud, a total bla$e day.


Fried Shrimp with Broccoli, Onions, Carrots, Rice, and Garlic Sauce.


Off work and back home.

All the bedroom doors are open – hanging out with Becca, James, Leisa, Darren, and Kelley. I crank up the volume to a “Them” playlist on Youtube. There’s makeshift dancing and squat exercises. Swinging the basketball around. I needed to release some steam tonight.


A bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch.


Sleep around 3:30 a.m.


[i] Savage Beauty. Alexander McQueen.

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