Tuesday April 19 2022

Alarm goes off at 11 a.m. Ana vies for affection and tries to come on to me. But I’m still distant and conflicted by everything. This spurs an uncomfortable morning argument about the relationship.

 

While I try to cook oatmeal she keeps wanting to address everything all at once. She really wants everything to work out and I’m standing over here lost and confused.

 

Oatmeal with Cinnamon, Blueberries, Flax Seed, and Almond Milk. English Breakfast Tea.

 

At the gym working out.

Not feeling good about Ana and I – it’s really weighing down on me.

 

Eggs. Sweet Potato. Spinach. Bagel. Coffee.

 

Teaching lessons at Music Makers.

 

Making some leftovers at home with Sardines, Quinoa, Veggies, and Edamame.

 

Rebecca and I drive over to Nigel’s to pick up the rental van that Nancy drove up from Florida.

 

I clean out the van and try to figure out how to put down this futon mattress cause this upcoming tour’s drive will be a long one.

 

Catching up on business back home.

 

Doing chores and such.

 

Pita Chips with Hummus and Pineapple.

 

Ana didn’t come home at all until past 3 in the morning, very unlike her. But I understand cause she probably just wanted to distance herself from the house and me.

...

We sit in my room – both of us sad about things. I talk about how our music community of friends is like one organism and how important that is to me in regards to what happens to us – also, in general how I’m afraid to lose what we have. We reach a common ground I suppose.

 

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